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The Test of Time Posts

Episode 29: Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)

Published January 20, 2017

Don’t let the picture fool you—this is *not* a movie about cannibalism. It’s the fifth highest grossing film of 1989 (yes, really): Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

We analyze the movie’s lesson on the frailty of life courtesy of Antie the ant, its poor demonstration of CPR technique, and other flicks with titles that are full sentences. Plus there’s an in-depth conversation about whether Super Mario is actually human or not in light of his upcoming adventures in New Donk City. We may not solve that mystery, but we do determine if Honey, I Shrunk the Kids stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 28: Wildcats (1986)

Published January 13, 2017

In the 1986 movie Wildcats, Goldie Hawn faces sexism as she tries to coach an inner city high school football team to victory. (Think Friday Night Lights meets 9 to 5 meets Stand and Deliver.)

The film features the big screen debut of Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson, a young LL Cool J in the role of “Rapper,” and a more feminist heroine than some other, more famous feminist heroines (cough cough, Erin Brockovich.) Along the way we ask if Super Mario Run is worth ten bucks… and if Wildcats stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 27: Airplane! (1980)

Published January 6, 2017


“We’ve got a fantastic movie in our podcast this week!”

“Your podcast? What is it?”

“It’s a digital audio file with losers who never shut up… but that’s not important right now.”

In our wide-ranging conversation about the slapstick comedy classic Airplane!, we chat about how you say “golly” in jive, what happens when the Zucker/Abrahams/Zucker trio breaks up, and we pay homage to the king of deadpan delivery, Leslie Nielsen. Plus we kick the episode off with a spoiler-filled analysis of Rogue One, and how that movie could affect Princess Leia’s role in Episodes VIII and IX. Looks like you picked the wrong week to quit podcasts… especially if you want to know if Airplane! stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 26: Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)

Published December 30, 2016

The Gremlins are back, and this time they’re terrorizing the most technologically advanced skyscraper in New York City.
Gremlins 2 is full of surprises: an ahead of its time transgender character, a not so subtle parody of Donald Trump, and even a connection to Breaking Bad. Our chat also includes predictions of the biggest movies of 2017, including our pick for the title of Star Wars Episode VIII. In the end, we find out if Gremlins 2 stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 25: Gremlins (1984)

Published December 23, 2016


A young man gets an incredible Christmas present: an adorable creature called a Mogwai. But rules are broken, and before long a small town is terrorized by little green creatures.

Join us as we discuss what constitutes a Christmas movie (does Die Hard count?), the true origin of the Gremlins species, and the Time Magazine Person of the Year… in 1982. Then—just in time for Christmas—we find out if Gremlins stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 24: Scrooged (1988)

Published December 16, 2016

A television executive who hates Christmas puts on a live version of A Christmas Carol, while also being visited by the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future in the Bill Murray movie, Scrooged.

You want off-topic tangents? We’ve got you covered with the most intriguing thing about Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. the problem with being a professional Bobcat Goldthwait impersonator, the funniest line in the Rush Hour trilogy, and James fondly/angrily recalling his favorite sketch from Late Night with Conan O’Brien. We also talk about Karen Allen, David Johansen (aka Buster Poindexter), and Bill Murray himself as we decide if Scrooged stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 23: Home Alone (1990)

Published December 10, 2016

A young child, abandoned by his family, is forced to survive on his own, while also battling two sadistic and violent robbers… in the wacky family flick, Home Alone!

Listen as we talk about how Home Alone affected the casting of Harry Potter, the reach of the American Dental Association, and the one movie where Joe Pesci’s character comes out on top. Ultimately we find out if Home Alone stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 22: The Rock (1996)

Published December 4, 2016

Nicolas Cage. Sean Connery. Tiny little balls of green nerve gas. And it’s a Michael Bay movie, so there are explosions all over the place.

This episode—recorded live—features the protocol of receiving a phone call mid-coitus, a breakdown of the movie’s brutal deaths, and the political correctness of the term “Mexican standoff.” Ultimately, we ask if The Rock stands the Test of Time. 


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Episode 21: The Last Starfighter (1984)

Published November 25, 2016

A boy dreams of leaving his trailer park, only to end up in outer space defending the galaxy in the 1984 movie, The Last Starfighter.
The movie features an alien race with Mr. Burns haircuts, the most reluctant hero ever, and plenty of “homages” to another popular film franchise (hint: it rhymes with Bar Doors.)

Join us for an episode that features tangents about The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters, Passenger 57, and the entire theme song from Blossom (it makes sense in context, honest.) When all is said and done, we find out if The Last Starfighter stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 20: Back to School (1986)

Published November 18, 2016

Rodney Dangerfield is the big (and old) man on campus in the 1986 college comedy, Back to School.

In this episode, we talk about the 2016 Ghostbusters (which is now subtitled “Answer the Call” for some reason), the oeuvre of William Zabka, and how hard academia can be for dead monkeys. Our final grade hinges on one question: does Back to School stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 19: Major League (1989)

Published November 11, 2016


The Chicago Cubs may have won the 2016 World Series, but the Cleveland Indians will always have the 1989 flick Major League.

Listen as we touch on the Presidential election, the Nintendo Switch, and the day Alan’s social life died. Plus we analyze Cleveland lofts, the movie’s most cringe-worthy line, and the character who looks like a grown up Bobby Hill, all as we ask: does Major League stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 18: Flight of the Navigator (1986)

Published November 4, 2016


In Flight of the Navigator, a young boy passes out in 1978, wakes up in 1986, then has to travel through space and time to get back home.

This week’s conversation includes talk about Star Wars Rebels, Twisted Sister, and cursing in Disney movies. Plus, we expose the fact that Christopher Nolan basically just ripped off this flick when he made Interstellar. In the end, we ask if Flight of the Navigator stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 17: The Thing (1982)

Published October 28, 2016

In John Carpenter’s horror classic The Thing, a group of Antarctic scientists have to contend with a shape-shifting alien… that may have already taken over one of their own.

Just in time for Halloween, we discuss a scary movie that stars a young(er) Wilford Brimley, features characters named Mac and Windows (#NerdHumor), and a computer that can somehow predict a Thing-pocalypse. Ultimately, we find out if The Thing stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 16: Sixteen Candles (1984)

Published October 21, 2016

No one made movies about teen angst like John Hughes. Sixteen Candles tells the story of Sam, a girl having the worst day of her life—on her sixteenth birthday—which her family forgot about.

This movie insulted geeks with Anthony Michael Hall, Asians with Long Duck Dong, and violated the cardinal rule of characters breaking the fourth wall. But is Sixteen Candles “so major” that it stands the Test of Time?


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Episode 15: Starship Troopers (1997)

Published October 14, 2016

Bugs, bullets, and boobs: Starship Troopers has it all.

In a wide-ranging conversation that touches on the new season of South Park, the genius of Michael Ironside, and what happens when you pull the hypotenuse of a love triangle, we dare to ask the age-old question: does Starship Troopers stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 14: Dave (1993)

Published October 7, 2016

This election season, we’re taking a look back at Dave, arguably the greatest rom-com ever centered around a Presidential impersonator.
We take a hard look at the First Lady’s very specific “type,” the fan-fiction James wrote about these characters, and why the movie should have been called “Joe President.” No matter your political affiliation, we all need to come together to debate the country’s most serious issue: Does Dave stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 13: Short Circuit (1986)

Published September 30, 2016


What does it mean to be alive? How does one feel? What is the nature of the soul? These heady questions are kinda sorta addressed in the 1986 movie, Short Circuit.

Come listen as we rant about Fishers Stevens in brown face, the major design flaw in these robotic super weapons, and one of the single biggest plot holes ever: what happened to Robot #4? In the end, we ask: does Short Circuit stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 12: Kindergarten Cop (1990)

Published September 23, 2016

It’s not a tumor… it’s a podcast! Arnold Schwarzenegger goes from action hero to (kinda) family friendly star in 1990’s Kindergarten Cop.

We chat about Detective John Kimble’s great one-liners and his shoddy police work. We talk about Crisp, the bad guy with the incredible ponytail and the least intimidating name ever. We even give the movie credit (or is it blame?) for inspiring flicks like The Pacifier and Tooth Fairy. And we do it all in the name of finding out: does Kindergarten Cop stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 11: The Mighty Ducks (1992)

Published September 16, 2016

A ragtag group of misfits are terrible at sports, until they get an inspirational new leader who teaches them important life lessons… and learns a little something himself along the way. Not sure which movie we’re talking about? Here’s a hint: this flick has Emilio Estevez!

Our conversation about The Mighty Ducks includes a healthy debate over what the insult “cake eater” means, a dissection of the movie’s subtle pro-vaccination message, and as a bonus blast from the past, we taste test Crystal Pepsi! All this as we ask: does The Mighty Ducks stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 10: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)

Published September 9, 2016


RIP Gene Wilder. In light of the beloved actor’s passing, we’re taking a look back at his most iconic role, the seminal film Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory.

Join us as we wonder what the hell a bean feast is, discuss the part of the movie that we always fast-forwarded, and Alan questions the *real* motives behind Wonka’s Golden Ticket ploy, all in the name of finding out: does Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory stand the Test of Time?


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Episode 9: Tommy Boy (1995)

Published September 2, 2016

Tommy Boy is the quintessential Chris Farley/David Spade movie (sorry, Black Sheep!) The movie’s got plenty of Farley’s falls, Spade’s sarcasm, and even some genuine emotion mixed in (RIP, Big Tom.)
Join us as we reenact our favorite Chris Farley SNL sketches, try to remember what Apple Newtons did, and reminisce on when cow tipping was a thing, all as we decide if Tommy Boy stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 8: Labyrinth (1986)

Published August 26, 2016

Don’t you just hate it when your annoying baby brother gets kidnapped by the Goblin King, and you only have 13 hours to venture through a magical labyrinth to get him back?

Sarah can relate.

In a conversation about the beloved cult classic Labyrinth, we also discuss the Netflix sensation Stranger Things, Nintendo 64 polygons, and, yes, David Bowie’s prominently featured crotch. Plus Alan sings, and James manages to confuse Bowie, Bob Dylan, Bruce Springsteen, and Simon and Garfunkel—all at the same time! Ultimately, we determine if the Jim Henson directed movie stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 7: The Goonies (1985)

Published August 19, 2016

Hey… you… guys! That’s what I said – booty traps! Down here, it’s our time!

The Goonies is the beloved—and highly quotable—80’s movie that sent a group of kids from the goondocks searching for the lost treasure of One Eyed Willie. Our chat covers The Goonies II Nintendo game, the brilliant decision to delete that terrible scene with the octopus, and just how medically accurate the movie is (spoiler alert: not very.) Then, when all is said and done, we determine if The Goonies stands the Test of Time.


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Episode 6: Stand By Me (1986)

Published August 12, 2016


This week marks the 30th (!) anniversary of Stand By Me, Rob Reiner’s coming of age story about four young friends who go on a journey to find a dead body.

Join us for a conversation that spans the horrors of leeches, a blueberry pie-eating contest with questionable rules, and how easy it is to adapt a Stephen King story into a movie. At the end, we ask if this movie, set in 1959 and released in 1986, stands the Test of Time in 2016.


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