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The Test of Time Posts

Episode 234: Elf (2003)

An elf raised at the North Pole discovers that he’s actually a human, and leaves Santa’s workshop to find his father in New York City.

For this year’s Christmas episode, we chat about where all the Ray’s Pizza locations have gone, the 80s sitcom that Buddy the Elf would have felt at home in, and the holiday song that *should* be canceled. Then we pass through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gumdrops, and walk through the Lincoln Tunnel to find out if Elf stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 233: Nine to Five (1980)

Three women get revenge on their sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot of a boss.

This week, special guest Courtney Noah joins us to talk about keeping health insurance reps employed, being prejudiced against deer, and writing on one-ply toilet paper. Then we tumble outta bed and stumble to the kitchen, pour ourselves a cup of ambition, and find out if Nine to Five stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 232: O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)

Three convicts, on the run from the law, try to find a long-lost treasure.

This week, we discuss cutting your hair with a Flowbee, how the KKK is like cheerleading camp, and what the Coen brothers have in common with fish. You won’t be a man of constant sorrow when you find out if O Brother, Where Art Thou? stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 231: Field of Dreams (1989)

Ray Kinsella builds a baseball field on his Iowa farm, and long dead old-timers show up to play.

This week, special guest Steve Hofstetter joins us to talk about the real villain of the Black Sox scandal, how baseball can defuse tense situations, and why this is the perfect date movie. If you listen, you’ll find out if Field of Dreams stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 230: The Beast (1988)

After destroying an Afghan village, Soviet soldiers try to outrun the mujahideen fighters that are hot on their trail.

This week, we chat about what makes a movie a flop, a not-so-scary notebook, and what RPG really stands for. Then we find out if The Beast stands the Test of Time. 

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Episode 229: The Outsiders (1983)

Kids from the wrong side of the tracks have to grow up fast when a member of their gang kills a rich bully.

This week, we discuss an extremely bizarre field trip, the difference between a rumble and fisticuffs, and the one way Entourage actually makes something better. Then we see if The Outsiders stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 228: “Crocodile” Dundee (1986)

Mick Dundee can tame the dangerous creatures of the Australian outback, but he faces a different kind of wildlife in the urban jungle of New York City.

This week, we chat about bidet mishaps, why you should never run barefoot on the streets of Manhattan, and the perfect metaphor for being a Mets fan. James also makes John Lennon spin in his grave as we find out if “Crocodile” Dundee stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 227: The American President (1995)

A charming widower tries to balance a new relationship with his demanding job… President of the United States.

This week, we discuss Amazon Alexas in the White House, Millard Fillmore’s character, and Elon Musk’s love life. Then we find out if 1995’s The American President stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 226: Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988)

A small town is invaded by… well, killer klowns from outer space. 

For our Halloween spooktacular, we chat about the “gumball” eyes on popsicles, why you shouldn’t describe what you’re doing while being chased, and what this movie has in common with Independence Day, Batman & Robin, and Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Then we find out if Killer Klowns From Outer Space stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 225: The Witches (1990)

Evil witches want to rid England of all its children, and the only person who can stop them is a little boy who’s been turned into a mouse. 

This week, we chat about an odd treatment for diabetes, how Roald Dahl was inspired by the ’86 Mets, and the “hamstertopia” that James built for his pet. Then we find out if 1990’s The Witches stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 224: Flight of the Phoenix (2004)

A plane crashes in the Gobi desert, and the survivors face starvation, thirst, and nomads as they struggle to stay alive.

This week, we discuss wise words from Buzz Aldrin, how not to start an inspirational speech, and getting demoted from “Captain” to “Mister.” We also chat about this year’s depressing iHeartRadio Music Festival before finding out if 2004’s Flight of the Phoenix stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 223: The Bodyguard (1992)

When a singer is threatened by a dangerous stalker, she hires — and then falls for — a handsome new bodyguard.

This week, we discuss traceable typewriters, Yelp reviews for hitmen, and pooping in Taylor Swift’s house. We also reveal the details of Nick’s Marathon 2020 before finding out if Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii will always love youuuuuuuuuuuuu! Nah, we just find out if The Bodyguard stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 222: Showgirls (1995)

A woman goes from giving lap dances to headlining a topless revue on the Las Vegas Strip.

This week, we talk about Alien Ant Farm’s Michael Jackson cover, a sex scene that looks like a shark attack, and what nude dancers have in common with the Sith. We also discuss our 2020 voting plans before finding out if Showgirls stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 221: The Gods Must Be Crazy (1980)

A man in Africa with no knowledge of the “modern world” goes on a quest to rid his tribe of an evil thing: a Coke bottle that fell from the sky.

This week, special guest Joanna Brief joins us to discuss a questionable use of Rock-A-Bye-Baby, a bizarre Yiddish catchphrase, and the comedic appeal of a terrorist who slips on banana peels (sorry.) Then we find out if The Gods Must Be Crazy stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 220: Double Impact (1991)

Twins, who were separated at birth, join forces as adults to get revenge on the gangsters who killed their parents.

This week, we chat about Jean-Claude Van Damme’s résumé, Bernie Madoff’s charity work, and Lindsay Lohan’s British accent. We also discuss Super Mario 3D All Stars before finding out if Double Impact stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 219: Mulan (1998)

A young woman pretends to be a man to protect her father, defeat the Huns, and save China.

This week, we discuss how animated horses are like snowflakes, why you shouldn’t name characters after food, and the benefits of zip-lining with someone who’s the size of Shrek. Then we find out if 1998’s Mulan stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 218: Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey (1991)

Bill and Ted are back, fighting evil robot versions of themselves and making their way through heaven and hell.

This week, we chat about the difference between a wedgie and a melvin, the history of the Happy Birthday song, and who watched the Hawaii Five-0 reboot. We also discuss The Batman, Flashpoint, and Chadwick Boseman (RIP) before finding out if Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 217: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989)

A pair of slackers are destined to change the world with their music. They just have to pass history first.

This week, we chat about grandfather clock maintenance, Keanu Reeves historians, and how Tom and Tom beat Bill and Ted. Be excellent to each other — and party on, dudes! — as we find out if Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 216: My Blue Heaven (1990)

A former gangster adjusts to life in the suburbs when he joins the witness protection program.

Special guest Samantha Noah returns to discuss shockingly inexpensive hot dogs, the dangers of garbage disposals, and how the Wet Bandits always seem to just walk into other people’s houses. Then we find out if My Blue Heaven stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 215: Goodfellas (1990)

Henry Hill rises through the ranks of the mafia, only to see it all come crashing down when he starts trafficking cocaine.

This week, special guest Samantha Noah joins us to discuss when you really need to get your car detailed, home decorating that is both tacky and awesome, and Joe Pesci’s skills as a rapper (yes, really). Then we find out if Goodfellas stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 214: Caddyshack (1980)

It’s the snobs against the slobs as a wealthy country club owner faces off against a brash real-estate developer, a zen golfer, and a group of wild teen caddies.

This week, we talk about that hooligan Tchaikovsky, universal words for poop, and how the producers of Super Friends saved money. Then we find out if Caddyshack stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 213: Coyote Ugly (2000)

A Jersey girl heads to New York City with dreams of becoming a successful songwriter, but ends up slinging drinks with other scantily clad bartenders.

This week, we chat about Art Garfunkel, why people in Manhattan don’t need to be validated, and the world’s biggest fan of The Calling. You can’t fight the moonlight as we find out if Coyote Ugly stands the Test of Time.

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Episode 212: Kids (1995)

A pack of reckless teenagers steal, have sex, and do drugs on a hot summer day in New York City.

This week, we discuss a chivalrous offer of corn dogs, an awkward conversation with your grandma, and the difference between malt liquor and beer. We also share our thoughts on the upcoming Ready Player Two novel before finding out if 1995’s Kids stands the Test of Time.

NOTE: Even though it’s about a movie called Kids, this episode is for adults only.

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Episode 211: Clueless (1995)

A popular teenager — who only cares about clothes and her social status — decides to start doing good deeds for others… with mixed results.

This week we discuss the dangers of liposuction, this movie’s most memorable line, and why James should have read Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. Then we find out if 1995’s Clueless stands the Test of Time.

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